Some Poetry for You

   Since Litmag was brought up today in class, I decided to share one of the poems I have submitted to it. I actually wrote this last year, but I wasn't able to submit it because I had written it after Litmag had already been published. I don't know why or how it came to me, but I've always felt that's the best kind of writing. When you have really no reason for writing, no assignment no due date, and you simply write it because it came to you. I think that's the essence of a great piece of writing because you are not writing it for any ones approval or recognition. You simply write it because it's what you feel you need to say. It's pure and it's real and it's you.

The Courage Hidden in a Leaf   

Summertime,

It hung there waving,

Green lost among green,

Indifferent to the world around it,

Simply enjoying the occasional breeze.

Then fall came,

It hung there frightened,

Brown and orange, sick and dying,

All around, his brothers falling,

But he’ll not go,

He’ll not be taken.

Winter fell,

A cold, harsh white,

Unforgiving, truly cruel,

A single leaf, on a withered tree,

Frozen over, battle lost,

A simple breeze and down he goes.

Spring arose,

For winters end,

The harsh white gone in a burst of color,

Plants re-grow and flowers bloom,

And on a tiny twig,

A hero is reborn.  

Bad Handwriting

   So I think my one and only true and biggest problem in English class has always been my incredibly terrible hand writing. It doesn't just apply to English class, but I think it's the worst in English because we have to write so frequently and in large amounts. I still have no idea how I have managed to make it to the 12th grade and be thought of as 'smart' when I have such unintelligible hand writing. Obviously my teachers have always had incredibly great perception skills. That or they have no idea what there looking at so to save themselves the trouble of deciphering it they just give me a good grade. I just don't know. Despite this I have never really bothered to improve my hand writing skills. It takes to much effort and time for me to try to write everything legible. The way I normally write is fast and fluid. My letters flow kind of like cursive letters but there regular letters and I can read it fine about 98% of the time. Besides, in today's world, and seeing as though I plan on going into some sort of programming career, I will be doing most of my writing on computers. I don't really see many things I will be having to write by hand except for maybe filling out a survey or something. With most job applications and other important documents I'll have to make, I'll more than likely have the option to type them up so that works for me. Overall, improving my hand writing skills is pretty low on my list of things to accomplish in life.

So much Stress!!!

   So it's been a semester of lots of hard and grueling work and now this semester is seeming even harder and more grueling. I have pretty much had no social life since we started reading Beloved. It's a good book and I really wish that we didn't have to do all these reading journals, which I am up to my neck in. I've always hated having to do activities like this while reading a good book. It takes the enjoyment out of it because your constantly having to tear yourself away from the book to write down your thoughts and whatnot. It's really annoying and it's cutting into my ME time! I hope Mullins doesn't give us so much work with whatever our next book is going to be. I know everyone in class would really appreciate it. Actually as I type this I realize I've forgotten all about getting my 2nd book for the inquiry project! I've been to busy with Beloved and on top of that I have work form other classes too! These last few couple of weeks have been very stressful and I hope the rest of the semester goes smoother. I'd like to possibly relax and have some fun during my last few weeks of my public education.

First Impression of Beloved

   I have mixed feelings about Beloved. I don't really like the author's writing style because it is difficult to understand and one must read a section slowly and multiple times in order to fully grasp, or at least semi-grasp, it's meaning. After reading through a section I would have to go back and try to analyze what it was that I had just read and how it tied into the overall story. It's also really sad and a little morbid. This family has been through so much and I feel lots of pity for them. But that's what makes me kind of like it. Beloved has a pretty nice story despite its complexity. The characters are interesting and their dark and sullen past is what makes reading about them intriguing. The supernatural element is also a nice touch adding some exciting fantasy that makes me want to keep reading to find out exactly what is going on. Going back to the interesting characters, I like how a major part of the book seems to revolve around the characters remembering and rediscovering their pasts, which they try so hard to forget. It makes it interesting to find out a characters past bit by bit and slowly piece their story together and how their pasts seem to correlate with the other character's pasts. I am ever so slowly forming a story out of the book, it's kind of like a jigsaw puzzle where we are given a mesh of pieces and we must slowly put them where they belong. So over all, I think I am liking, but not loving, Beloved.

The end of The Road

   So I kind of liked the ending of the book but at the same time I didn't. The parts I liked was the symbolism and meaning put into those last few pages. It shows how the boy has changed from who he was a the beginning of the book. He's become more of his own person, with his own interpretations of the world and his own will to survive. I also like how the boy and the man seem to switch roles at the end. All along the man has been completely taking care of the boy who he sees as a god-like creature whom he must protect with his life, but at the end of the book, with the man's disease finally taking hold, the boy assumes the role of care giver, if only for a short time. The boy then holds vigil and tries to protect him when he hears someone, the veteran, approaching. Later the boy reveals that he'd rather talk to his father than talk to God, so it seems that now it is the boy who reveres his father as a god like creature, one who took car of him and showed him how to keep the will to live. I also notice that after the father's death, the book doesn't reveal to the boy as 'the boy' anymore, but instead as 'He', where once the man was referred to as 'He.' This is another way in which McCarthy hints at their role reversal.

   What I didn't like about the ending is mostly my own personal feelings. I just thought it was a little to coincidental that so soon after his father's death, the boy would find 'good people' to be his new family. I just find it hard to accept. I feel it was supposed to be symbolic of a hopeful future, but I still think it was to much. I would have preferred the boy going out on his own, seeing how he had grown up so much during the journey's course. It still would've been hopeful because of his good nature. The reader would feel hope for the future thinking that there is one good person who is making it in this devastated world and  is still managing to keep such altruistic morals and if there is one, then there must surely be others out there.

The World is Dead- Found Poetry

   So here is my found poetry that I wrote in class:

The World is Dead

A little boy

Flickering

In the cold bleak depths

Of a dead black void

Sightless white eyes

With nothing to see

There is no light

There is no morning

A dimension without light

A dimension of night

A blacktop of a world

A darkness dripping darkness

Little boy face the truth

The world is dead

   I really liked this activity, because I love poetry. I got into my poetical state of mind and after skimming my words from the quotes I had collected I knew that I would write a poem about darkness and hopelessness because pretty much every word I found involved either one or both of those so I knew my poem would easily come to me. That's usually how I get when ever I do writing of any sort. I stop and think about what it is that I am going to write then, slowly the vision comes to me and I begin to write what I feel. This is why I am not good at writing research papers or times writings; I'm not given the time or the opportunity to be as creative or emotionally invested as I would like to be. I much rather prefer writing poems and short stories. I really hope we do more activities like this in class. 

The Road so far

   So far I am liking The Road pretty well. At times it can be a little slow paced but within the slowness is a very nicely crafted story. Every sentence and every word seems to have some kind of deep profound meaning and nothing is just there to fill space. I really like McCormac's writing style because of its fluidity and poetic feel. Not every sentence, but lots of them, seem like poetry with their feeling and emotion. I especially love the passage-

   What would you do if I died?
   If you died I would want to die too.
   So you could be with me?
   Yes. So I could be with you.
              -(Pg. 11)
  
   These few lines, to me, have so much passion and emotion and most of all they have so much reality. It sounds like lines from a beautiful poem. It makes me feel more than anything else I have ever read in any book. The words are simple but they speak with great depth and such emotion that anyone who reads this must be able to relate in some way and need to pause to think about who they love and who they would die for.  That's what I did when I read this and I will always remember this simple conversation because it captures exactly how I feel when I think about the people I love.

   I like post apocalyptic tales like The Book of Eli and A Crack in the Sky where we read about what might be a possible future for the human race. I think they are really cool and interesting because it shows humans striving to rise above their limits and find a way to keep themselves alive. These things are fun to read about because I don't really have the opportunity to experience these apocalyptic worlds first hand. All other post apocalyptic books I have read have had hope at the heart of them, but The Road is pretty cool because it turns away from that and simply has bleak and bleary, with little to no hope of salvation in it. It is real somber and kind of depressing but again, it gives a sense of experiencing what I may never have the opportunity to actually experience so it is a cool thing to read.